How To Overcome Restrictions Placed On Me Because I Am A Girl?

1005 views | 30 May 2011

Question: I have recently joined a dance group in my college. We have a show coming up in March which requires a stay of two days outside Delhi. When I asked my mother, she out-rightly rejected. She said if it were for studies she would have allowed me. My brother is into sports and he's always encouraged to travel for his tournaments. She says I am not mature enough for this (my brother is younger than me).I need your guidance on the matter so that I can make her understand. Gurumaa: Well, this is called discrimination. Boys against girls, boys always get freedom and liberty to do anything and everything. Whereas girls are always monitored by the parents, by society, by relatives and there is a long list of do's and don'ts. The denial of going outside to perform is only one of the things—if you look closely—there would be many other instances where you would be forbidden not to do certain things. It is not easy to change anyone's mindset but still, keep talking to your mother that this is discrimination and not fair to you, let her understand. She doesn't trust her own upbringing that her girl can save herself, and make the right decisions for herself and protect herself? Parents are always insecure, especially about their girls, because they are scared of molestation, pregnancies, running away, elopement and marriage. Well, they don't have such fears for their sons, but always for their daughters. That is how society sees the girl— as powerless, a fool and unintelligent. You have to prove it with your life, with your actions and your thoughts that you are not what they think you are. It is a long process, but I can say that I am there for you to endorse you. Yet make all decisions of your life with maturity and sanity—not because of some haphazard liking or disliking.